Proverbs and Raising Children

Adina and I can’t pretend to be good parents, since we don’t have any experience as such, but we have lately been discussing a problem that appears to be quite common in the circles we’ve spent most of our lives in (and maybe where we are now, too, but we haven’t had much experience yet).

The problem we’ve seen is that Christian children are often raised using two conflicting methods. On the one hand, they are taught the gospel and that they need to trust Christ to be saved. On the other hand, they are taught that they need to be good, but the two are rarely connected.The problem here is that there can be no real “being good” apart from the gospel. Sanctification of adults or children is not about learning to be good, and not about learning to force yourself not to sin. It’s about learning to love and trust Christ for the righteousness you can never have. Will this have the effect of causing you to sin less and less as you grow? Most definitely! This is not the goal, however. It is a fruit, but not the goal.As I was thinking about this and thinking that I needed to work this out more, I came across this article by Nathan Pitchford that strikes at the heart of the matter. He’s not specifically talking about raising children, but he deals with the book of Proverbs, which is often used as a disjointed serious of proverbs along the lines of “Confucius says ” In reality, as Nathan shows, these proverbs are useless in the long run when they are disconnected from the person and work of Christ.I highly encourage reading his article. I know people aren’t terribly likely to read articles referenced from blog posts, but this one is well worth your time. And relax, it’s something Presbyterians, Baptists, and whatever else you are can agree on.